The Adventures Of The Cow

Performed by adam sandler, frank, and randi



Transcribed by a fan



"and now a cow at bat in the bottom of the 6th inning of a little league game getting hit by a pitch"



[baseball sounds and cow bell ringing,ball is hit and hits cow]

Cow: moo



"and now a cow who goes skydiving for the very first time, and thinks his parachute isn't gonna open when it finnally does 40 feet from the ground"



[plane sounds]

M1: alright cow, don't even think about just jump and enjoy the ride down, quit being a pansy and do it

Cow: moo

[ripcord sounds]

Cow: moo,mrr

[parachute opens]

Cow: moow

[thud]



"and now a cow who goes to the chicken hot drivethru and then gets halfway home before realising they forgot his french fries"



[cow opening paper bag]

Cow: moo,moo

[car screeches, and turns back around]

Cow: mrr



"and now a cow winning first prise in the bellyflop contest at spring break and then realises he can't swim"



[cow walking towards pool, big splash]

Cow: moo

[crowd cheering]

Cow: mrr,mrr

[underwater moo]



"and now a club gets a dance at a classy strip club, when a bouncer notices he doesn't have any shoes on"



F1: ohh baby you like it when i dance with you

Cow: moo

F1: uh uh uh, you can't touch that

Cow: moo

Bouncer: keep your hands off the girl

Cow: moo

Bouncer: hey cow, you got no shoes on you gotta leave

Cow: moo

M2: hey watch it cow



"and now a cow playing tennis against farmer stinky thumbs arbuckle when the farmer makes an obvious bad call"



[tennis ball being hit]

Farmer: that was out

Cow: moo

Farmer: don't tell me it wasn't cause i saw it and that was out

Cow: moo

Farmer: by at least 3 feet that's how far, come in look there is still a mark where it's out

Cow: moo

Farmer: don't tell that was from an old ball, that was this ball and this ball was out

Cow: mrr

Farmer: you cannot see from that angle

Cow: moo



"and now a cow recieves a phone call who he thinks is from a famous actor but he soon finds out it's just a practical joke"



[phone rings, cow picks it up]

Farmer: hello may i speak to the cow

Cow: moo

Farmer: hi, i'm a famous actor

Cow: moo

Farmer: oh, thank you very much, i was wondering if you would like to go to dinner with me

Cow: moo

Farmer: why don't i make reservations?

Cow: moo

Farmer: and why don't i tell you my real name? farmer stinky thumbs arbuckle

Cow: mrr

Farmer: take that fatty

Cow: mrr

[slams down phone]



"and now a cow gets his revenge on farmer stinky thumbs arbuckle"



[car sounds]

Farmer: pull over, pull the vehicle to the side of the road, i am warning you for the last time.

[car hits farmer]

Farmer: oooh

Cow: mooooooooooooo


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